Should we cancel Netflix? Exploiting girls or exposing truth?

Episode 28

If you are wondering if Netflix is promoting pedophilia and hyper-sexualization of our kids with this Cuties movie, hold the remote and listen to this first!! 

As a background, this is an excerpt from a September 15, 2020, Washington Post Op-Ed by Maïmouna Doucouré, the writer and director of the movie “Cuties.”

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Full Transcription:

Speaker 1: (00:00)
Hey there, here we are again. And I am coming to you live from my she shed. Can you believe it? I'm just kidding. I wish I had a she shed. If you don't know what I'm talking about. Go back and listen to my episode from last week where I told you about how I do my episodes from my closet. And then I could really use a shisha because everybody and their mother or their boyfriend or their friend is at my house these days. And there's not really many places I can go to get quiet and private so that I can do these episodes. So if you hear background noise, if you hear washer, dryer going be her, and then it's somebody coming into my bathroom, which is right off of where I'm at in my walking closet, in the master bedroom. So I know that's way more information than you ever wanted to know about me, right? But here we are for another episode. And today I'm going to talk about something that I bet you have heard about, but I wonder if you have investigated further. I did not. And when I did, I was rather surprised.

Speaker 2: (00:57)
Stay tuned. Welcome to your source for tips, tools, and support to help you be that mom that is tuned in and proactive for yourself, your family, and for the wild ride of raising kids in this digital age, inspired by a mother's love with a relatable, real life. Proud to be that mom flair. This is the bead that mom movement with your host Dolly Denson. Okay. So did you miss me? I didn't

Speaker 1: (01:24)
Pop up in your little podcast thing as many times this week or last week as I wanted to, because I had to get a new computer. I realized a couple of weeks ago that my computer was running really slow. It was kind of like a dinosaur computer cause I've had it for a couple of years. I use it so much that the letters on the keypad were worn off in several places. So it was time to get a new computer. So I went ahead and invested in a Mac computer and I love it. It is wonderful. I'm so glad that I got it. But you know, if you have had a Mac or have a Mac, there's a little bit of a learning curve, learning all the different things. And I just have to say, I love it. So that's why I didn't get any more episodes out because I had to figure out how to use this thing.

Speaker 1: (02:06)
So anyways, it is quite, quite awesome. Hey friends, did you hear there is an app that will transform the safety of your kids, smartphone and technology use. It is my favorite way to sleep easy at night and have peace of mind because it is monitoring my kids' activity online without me being in their business. It is the bark app and yes, bark like a dog bark bark bark. It tells you when there's something that you need to be concerned about starting at a small fee each month, you can protect your whole family across all devices. Get connected with bark today. Use code, be that mom for 20% off your subscription for life and get a seven day free trial to check it out.

Okay, I am getting ready to save this episode. I'm actually recording this little segment at the very end right before I'm going to save it and put it out into the world.

Speaker 1: (02:55)
But I have to tell you that as I was trying to figure out what to title this episode, I went and looked at some of the things that are out there on this topic. And I was kind of like a little bit scared that I'm going to be totally chastised for this because there are quite a few people that have like high profile names and positions that are completely very harshly saying this all or nothing thing about anybody who watches this movie. Anybody that tries to take the topic of this movie and, you know, twisted around that it has a message is just downright supporting pedophilia, or you are one. And that's very, very harsh. And my guess is that most people out there that have jumped up this bandwagon, didn't actually watch this movie as I will mention in this episode code. But bear with me, give me some grace.

Speaker 1: (03:53)
I hope fuel listened to my viewpoint, and I hope you will continue to listen after this episode. But if you've listened to any of these at all, you know, my heart, you know that my mission is to help keep our kids safe and our digital world that we are here to guide them and to build a solid foundation for them as they get older. And the, the stark reality is that the digital age and raising kids in this digital world, this is a new realm of parenting. And that's what I'm all about. And so when I'm going to talk about a topic, I'm not just going to talk about, add it because everybody else is talking about it. I'm here to give you the information, give you another viewpoint, give you tips and tools and all of those things. So I hope you know that, and I hope you'll keep listening and let's get moving on this topic.

Speaker 1: (04:43)
Okay. So let's talk about the topic at hand today, and that is this whole cancel Netflix campaign. Have you heard about this thing? I started hearing about it. I don't know when a week or two ago, maybe two weeks ago, and it's all over. If you haven't heard about it. It is all over the movie called cuties that Netflix started advertising and there started to be this huge outrage over Netflix, having this movie advertised on the platform because of the picture that they chose to put as the cover, which was the picture of these young girls. I think they're supposed to be around like 11 years old, in very provocative clothing and kind of a bird provocative stance because they are in a dance competition. So that happened to be the picture that Netflix chose to put on the cover. And so what started to happen was people were singing that this was promoting pedophilia.

Speaker 1: (05:41)
It was promoting all of the things that most of us are against when it comes to making our children look like objects and the provocative clothes and makeup and all of the different things that seem to be happening at younger and younger ages. So I was watching all of this going on on social media, the whole cancel Netflix thing in different circles that I'm in, everybody talking about it. Every, everybody outraged about this saying, they're canceling Netflix. They're not going to support them anymore. They're going to take that money and put it elsewhere because they're not going to support a platform that is putting a movie like this on their platform. So I didn't cancel Netflix. Honestly, I have several shows on there that I like to watch. One of them is Cobra and I would love it at Cobra. Kai's next year season would come out because my husband and I have watched both season one and season two.

Speaker 1: (06:29)
And we're like, okay, we need season three. We both grew up when the first karate kid movies came out and I loved those movies when I was a kid. So I'm really chomping at the bit for the new Cobra Kai season to come out. But I did not watch this movie because I didn't want to be one of the ones promoting it. Everybody says, if you watch it, then that makes the ratings go up. And then it's going to be put on the top list and more people are going to watch it. And Netflix, isn't going to take it down and all of the things, right. So I hadn't really thought much more about it. I hadn't looked into it more until I sat down the other night in the living room with my husband to watch Cobra Kai. And he told me that he did watch the movie surprised.

Speaker 1: (07:08)
I don't know when he had time to do that, but he said he was, did watch the movie. And so I asked him, you know, so what did you think of it? And before I go into what he thought about it, let me use this as an analogy. So if you're not a friends fan, you may not get this. But if you are a friends fan, as in the show, friends, think about the episode where Chandler comes home. And he talks about the company that he worked, that they had a commercial that they were making. So as he's telling Joey about this, Joey says, Oh, well, can you cast me in it? Can you get me a spot in the commercial? And Chandler's like, is you're really not fit for the part. And he goes, sure, I am. And he starts impersonating all these different things.

Speaker 1: (07:48)
And then Chandler comes back and says, you know, we're looking for a professor for E commerce solutions, something or other. And Joey's like, I can do that. And so he keeps bugging Chandler about casting him for that. And Chandler keeps coming back and saying, look, I said, you're not right for the part. So Joey goes off and he comes back with the tape and he says, show me this to your bosses, show this to your bosses so that they know what I'm all about. And Chandler takes the tape, but he doesn't watch it. So then Joey comes back and he's like, so did you watch the tape? And Chandler says, yeah, I watched the tape and I showed it to my bosses, but they didn't go for it. And he's like, but you watch the tape. He goes, yeah, but they didn't go for it.

Speaker 1: (08:27)
And then Joey knows that he didn't watch the tape because it's of him advertising a lipstick for men. And he knows that if Chandler would have watched it, that he would have had more to say about it, you know, because Chandler is always making the jokes and all of that. So Joey pops in the tape to play it for Chandler and it starts out and he goes itchy bond lipstick for men. And then he goes on to show him playing a guitar. And he's got this blue lipstick on. And then in the end he goes itchy bond lipstick for men. And so Chandler and Rachel is there now, Ray, they're both like speechless. And then Joey goes, see, that's why I know you didn't watch the tape. And then Chandler goes, he really is a chameleon because in the beginning he had said, I'm a chameleon.

Speaker 1: (09:14)
I can play any of these parts. So anyways, my point is that everybody is outraged about this, but it tells me that most likely, most people have not watched this movie. And I get it that you don't want to watch it. And then up the ratings, I was the same way. And I was also sitting in the camp of kind of outraged that Netflix would carry this movie. And then in light of everything going on in our world, I thought, man, what is the world coming to? Like, I don't even know what to think about this year, 20, 20 anymore. So after I talked to my husband, he's like, you know, they're making it out. Like, it's this thing promoting pedophilia and the provocativeness of exploiting girls and their young bodies and all of that stuff. But he said, it's actually quite the opposite. And so he goes, and he tells me about the movie.

Speaker 1: (10:00)
So I ended up watching it. And it's basically a girl who, uh, I believe she's around 11 years old and she's observing other girls and kind of wondering about things. And so she becomes friends with these girls that are practicing for a dance competition. And this dance competition is where they, you know, where the normal dance clothes that you see a lot of girls wearing in dance competitions, but they're, they're doing provocative moves. And so at first they don't want this girl to be a part of their little group, but she finally, you know, kind of earns their trust and becomes a part of their group. And then she comes up with another few dance moves. So they have this little dance routine going on. Then she finds her uncle's smartphone and starts getting on Instagram or social media and kind of gets pooled in posting things.

Speaker 1: (10:47)
And it being light and being happy about that and it helping her feel good and all of those things. So then the movie progresses through a series of things where she's trying to discover herself and, you know, comparing herself to others. She starts wearing more provocative clothes and makeup and putting her hair up and all of the things. And then it comes to the dance competition. So she gets up there and they're doing this dance and the audience is watching them and they're doing all these provocative moves. The audience is watching them and they are outraged and kind of like, you know, making faces. And I don't know if they were booing them or what, but they were basically not promoting this form of dancing and not supporting it, not clapping, none of that stuff in the middle of the dance. This girl realizes that this is not who she wants to be.

Speaker 1: (11:30)
She runs off stage. She runs home. She hugs her mom. And then the end of the movie ends with her not being all dressed up, not being all provocative and everything that she's doing in her simply jumping rope and doing things that kids do other than sitting on their screens and comparing themselves on social media. So I actually think the message of the movie movie was a journey of a young girl kind of discovering this whole comparison thing as she's going through puberty and kind of finding where she wants to fit in. So I don't think this is much different than the childhood 2.0 movie that I talked about in my last episode. And some of these other things that have been put out recently. So it's basically like them. It's just another way to show this being that we all need to be outraged about.

Speaker 1: (12:18)
But I think that most people that haven't watched this movie, the outreach is misplaced. The outrage needs to be in the tech companies yeah. Or making these social media yeah. Apps and all of the things so addicting and the outrage she needs to be in the influence of these things on our kids and the outrage B. And we need to be educating each other and we need to be, we holding our children closer. We need to be much more proactive in being that mom or that dad in making sure that their interaction with the digital world is not defining them completely. And that we are guiding them to interact in a way that it is useful for them without breaking them down without making them think that they're not enough without having them constantly comparing themselves to others and thinking that they're not good enough.

Speaker 1: (13:11)
So I hope you're seeing and hearing my point in what I'm talking about is that this whole cancel Netflix thing, there needs to be a much bigger conversation of outrage over us, guiding our kids and being that mom for our kids, so that when they get to adulthood, they are balanced and well adjusted and able to navigate this world. And in reality, the digital world is not going away and it's here. You know, it's here to stay and it has many, many good things about it, but uncensored unmonitored, without any boundaries in the hands of a young child is not a good thing. And of course I'm against, um, pedophilia, I'm against exploiting children against human trafficking. I'm against all of those things that everybody is outraged with this whole cancel Netflix thing. I'm just saying that if you watch the movie, you'll realize that it's actually not Netflix itself, that we should be outraged about.

Speaker 1: (14:06)
And the unfortunate thing of it all is that they chose, they had poor judgment in how they chose the cover picture to be when you pop up and see that movie on Netflix, they should have chose the picture sure. That they now have up on there, which shows the lead character. The girl looking kind of like often a distance and troubled, which is what the movie really is about. So I hope you found this helpful. If you feel inclined to go watch the movie and feel free to reach out to me to chat more about this, to chat about anything related to your kids and being that mom's strong and all of the good things that I talk about. And I hope that you continue to listen to this podcast. Thank you so much for all of your support with it. As I have said in many other episodes, if your kid does not have a smartphone, listen to some of my episodes about the best phone to start with, listen to my episode about the app that you need to help monitor the phone when you do give them a smartphone and connect with me because I have some really good things coming out soon that I want you to be the first to know about when I get them released to help guide you with all of this.

Speaker 1: (15:10)
And so you don't feel so lost and that you have the support that you need to continue to be strong in being that mom. All right. Thank you so much for tuning in. I will chat with you next time. And again, if you know someone who has she shared connections, hook me up. All right. Okay, bye. So did you hear there is actually a dumb smartphone? It is like the best thing for parents as we introduce the digital world to our kids, it is created by a dad that wanted to give his child a phone without giving them access to the entire world. No internet, no pictures, no sleazy messages and seriously your kids. Can't fool you with this either. Grab your gab wireless dumb smartphone [email protected] using code. Be that mom for money off to get you started and keep your kids safe. Thanks for tuning in being that mom isn't easy, but together we can be that mom's strong. Don't forget to leave a review, connect on social and join Dolly's free community till next time.