Is your kid's watch a portal to porn? Be in the know!

Aug 22, 2022

 

Episode 97:

A watch is a great first option for keeping in touch with your kids, but is the watch you gave them a portal to access pornography? Listen in to this episode to learn more!

As a background for this episode, according to the website Enough is Enough (https://www.enough.org/stats_porn_industry), 50% of 11- to 13-year-olds, 65% of 14- to 15-year-olds and 78% of 16- to 17-year-olds reported having seen pornography in some way (shown/sent by someone else, searched for/stumbled upon it).

It is often only 1 or 2 clicks away from any internet search; so it is out there, and this episode shares another way that kids can access it, that many of us parents probably don't realize; and emphasizes why a "dumb" watch is the way to go when giving a watch to start their digital journey. 


Listen to it now here or click HERE for your favorite podcast platform! 


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Full Transcription: 

Speaker 1 (00:00):

Giving a watch is oftentimes a great first step for getting your kid connected somehow when they're away from you, but are you giving your kid a watch that has a window into things that you don't realize they can access, stay tuned.

Speaker 2 (00:19):

Welcome to your source for tips, tools, and support to help you be that mom that is tuned in and proactive for yourself, your family, and for the wild ride of raising kids in this digital age, inspired by a mother's love with a relatable real life. Proud to be that mom flare. This is the be that mom movement with your host, Dolly Denson.

Speaker 1 (00:45):

Holy moly. Check this out. If you are a mom that is looking to give your kiddo a phone, but you don't want to open up the world of the smartphone to them yet, check out the pinwheel phone. The pinwheel phone is the latest and greatest four dumb smartphones. It gives you absolute control over what they do and who they can contact and will help them to develop healthy habits around using a phone, check out pinwheel, pinwheel.com use code be that mom 10 for a discount. So welcome back to the be that mom movement podcast. I'm so glad that you are here. Today's episode is gonna have some information that I really, really want you to hear. And if this does not apply to you, please share it with parents that may be in this situation because it actually really surprised me when I discovered it.

Speaker 1 (01:35):

And I just knew I had to make an episode today and get this out there to you as quickly as I could. So before I go into the content for today, just wanna say in full transparency that I am sitting in a hotel room right now, I honestly have a love, hate relationship with air conditioning units in hotel rooms. I'm usually too cold <laugh> or too hot. And for this hotel stay I'm by myself. But if my husband was here, it would be even worse, cuz he likes it to be cold. And you know, at home I can't keep it cold because it, our electricity bill would be through the roof if we kept the house too cold. So when we're in a hotel room, he likes to keep it colder, but I've turned off the AC and ho I'm not gonna have any other background noise, but sometimes there is a loud car that drives by that you can hear outside.

Speaker 1 (02:23):

So if there is any background noise that you hear apologize for that, but this content is something that I wanted to get out to you. I am flying home tomorrow. And so I figured if I didn't record this today, it will probably be at least a couple of days before I get it recorded. And this information is something that every parent needs to know about. So what I wanna talk about is being able to access pornography through a smart watch. And the one that I tested because the one that I have is an apple watch and it was mind blowing when I saw that I could pull it up so very easily. I did not know that the apple watch had that capability. And if you're like me, not real tech savvy. So that's why giving kids the things is sometimes major challenging for parents like me and maybe you, because they are tech savvy and they are growing up with this capability.

Speaker 1 (03:22):

And so they are able to navigate this very quickly. And then the other thing is that when I saw a post about this and I was like, okay, I gotta figure out if I can really do this on my apple watch, I Googled it. And of course there's a website out there that tells you exactly how to get an internet connection on your apple watch and pull up a webpage. So it took me all of two seconds to do that. And then I followed those instructions. And before you know it, I was accessing pornography on my apple watch. Unbelievable. So the reason I bring this up is because this is something I recommend in might be that mom movement method toolkit that I'm getting ready to publish as an a very good first step is to start with a watch or a now I can't forget what they call, but they're like a little walkie talkie type device as a first step to stay connected with your kiddo when they are going to be away from you and not having to give them a phone that opens them up to all of the digital things and so many more struggles or like tugs of war with them in terms of how addictive the phones are and how much they can suck you in.

Speaker 1 (04:33):

You know, of course, giving a gab phone, a pinwheel phone, those type of things, and putting bark is certainly a good option as well. But if you have a younger kid that you're wanting to have a way to stay connected with them, a watch is a great, great option. And I see parents mention often that they're just gonna go ahead and give them an apple watch or, you know, give them one of the smart watches because it just makes more sense. They don't wanna do these other ones. Maybe the watches are a little bit too childlike looking for their kid or something like that. Well, this is a reason <laugh> why I recommend that you definitely check out the watches that are available through those different options. And I'll go over those again in just a minute, but just to kind of hit this, the importance of this, they say that pornography is usually one or two clicks away for any child that is online.

Speaker 1 (05:26):

So regardless of what your feelings are about pornography studies have shown that kids exposed to it at younger ages, or just exposed to it in general, in the teen years that it can have an effect on them and the younger they are, the more of an effect it can have and also just creates a unrealistic idea of what sex is so highly recommend that you have some sort of layer or plan or filter something that limits what sites they're allowed to go to if they are allowed to go online by themselves, because it is a slippery slope and it's kind of a black hole. And if you have ever raised kids, <laugh> through the middle school years, especially boys, one of them will hear about it. And before you know it, they're sending the link to everybody and before you know, it they're all looking at it.

Speaker 1 (06:24):

They're all curious and curious, killed the cat when it comes to a child <laugh> that is growing up, you know, and learning like curiosity is completely normal for them, but with the digital things that their fingertips so readily, it can be so dangerous. And so what do I wanna say, like impairing on their development, stunting their mental development and possibly causing trauma by the things that they see. So what I found out today is that you can send a link to your watch by sending a text with the link to yourself, or having someone else send it to you or sending yourself an email with the link. So if you try to do this, you know, pull up, I didn't know any porn site except for I heard of porn hub. So I sent that to myself in a text and pulled that up immediately on my watch.

Speaker 1 (07:23):

I couldn't figure out how to do it from my watch. It had to be sent to my watch. And I tried to look for like a internet app, those type of things. And there isn't one that I could find. And according to the, the website that I found that had instructions on how to do this, there isn't an app for internet connection, but if you send a link, it opens up a hidden safari page. And then with that, it will open up whatever website it is that has been sent to you. So very, very important information to know if you have a kiddo that has a smart watch, I'm assuming the other smart watches out there are similar. Now the article or the social media posts that I saw about this, I forget what company was posting about it, but they said that they talked to apple.

Speaker 1 (08:14):

They called them and just acted as a curious parent. And they said that you can set up some type of firewall type thing in the screen time, parental controls. But when they tried to do it, they couldn't figure out how to block it that way. So it's possible that there's a way to block it or filter it through the parental controls also might be possible to put bark. You know, if you have bark on their phone, that might be able to monitor like them sending the text bark might pick up on the text and let you know that they sent this text that had porn in the link or something to that effect. So those are two things that could pick it up. If you're in the situation where you already have given them a smart watch, but I'm not one to say that, pull it all away and <laugh>, you know, shut the world down and all of that, unless you're in an extreme situation and you need to regroup, you need to detox.

Speaker 1 (09:14):

There is a place for that. I did that with my own child and it was the best thing we did at the time, but it wasn't before we tried multiple things of communication talking, trying to, you know, kind of reroute things. And when we realized that wasn't working and things were really, really going south very quickly in that we were on the brink of a crossroads, that we weren't gonna be able to come back from easily involving much more than anything like pornography. We did pull back. We did cut off completely from all digital things and made very extreme actions in order to regroup detox, figure out what in the world was going on. But I don't think that that's necessarily always what you need to do. So I wouldn't panic yank the watch away and, you know, go run in whatever, but, you know, use your own judgment, your kid's personality and their temperament and all of that.

Speaker 1 (10:10):

But this is just knowledge for you to know of and for you to figure out how to move forward with us. But if you have not given a watch or if, you know, young moms that maybe in this situation soon where they're wanting to give a watch, I do wanna tell you that the watches that I know of that get the best reviews is the gab watch. And you can go to G wireless.com or use the link in my show notes. And there is a discount code. My discount codes be that mom, and that will give you a discount on that G watch. And then I don't see that pinwheel has a watch. I was looking, but it looks like the only thing they have right now is the phone. Now the tick talk watch. So T I C K T a L K, is the watch that I hear about as the one that most moms love.

Speaker 1 (11:06):

The, the one that most rave about is the tick talk watch for younger kids. And it comes like in a little case. So it's protected in all of that, but those are the ones that I would recommend. And I do have a discount code for the TikTok watch as well. I do recommend checking those out and starting with one of those. If you're going to do the watch route versus giving the smart watch in having the slippery slope of so many little caveats that you may not be able to monitor certainly is something that I think bar would probably potentially catch, but probably can't guarantee it. And that tends to be the case with apple, with most things. So that's why they say that apple or iPhones, aren't the best first phone for kids because they're not as easily monitored. I did give my kids an apple phone to start.

Speaker 1 (12:01):

And if I did it over again, my attitude at that time was, well, we have apple phones. It'll just be easier for us to all have apple phones. If I had it to do over again, I probably would start with an Android phone. One that I could monitor more and have very strict rules, all the things that I'm gonna share and might be that mom movement, method toolkit, and course so definitely recommend you check those things out and pass that along to young moms that may be approaching this as well as access it for yourself. If you are needing more guidance with this and resources and all the things to pivot and all of that <laugh> because I know there is oftentimes a lot of pivots and it's different for each kiddo since I've raised three and each one was completely different on this path.

Speaker 1 (12:44):

So check out those options for watches, if you're in need of that. And definitely if you are in the place of already having, given a smart watch, explore this and see what, you know, the capabilities are on the watch that they have and keep the lines of communication open with your kiddo. And, you know, just decide what you think is best for you and your kid going forward. But I did wanna get this out to you because I could not believe it. I was sitting I'm in Boise, Idaho and was attending a conference. And as the conference was ending today and I was putting my stuff away, I was like, okay, I'm gonna go back to hotel room and record this podcast. And I sat down and tried to figure out how to send it, sent it. And so I am sitting there in the middle of the conference with pornography, playing on my smart watch.

Speaker 1 (13:36):

Not that it had any sound, but I just could not believe what I was seeing. And it wasn't even just like anything mild, like the website pulled up and there's, I just scrolled. And there's all these people having sex all up and down as I scrolled. So yeah. Crazy stuff, definitely something I wanted you to know about. So please reach out to me. If you have any questions, please check out my show notes for all my links and all the discount codes that I have and keep your eye out for my course, that's coming out soon. That's gonna be your toolkit, your roadmap, a place for you to start and a place for you to pivot and figure out what to do next on your path to being that mom. All right. Have a great day. Thank you for tuning in Hey friends, did you hear there is an app that will transform the safety of your kids' smartphone and technology use.

Speaker 1 (14:25):

It is my favorite way to sleep easy at night and have peace of mind because it is monitoring my kids' activity online without me being in their business. It is the bark app and yes, bark like a dog bark bark bark. It tells you when there's something that you need to be concerned about starting at a small fee each month, you can protect your whole family across all devices. Get connected with bark today. Use code, be that mom for 20% off your subscription for life and get a seven day free trial to check it out.

Speaker 2 (14:57):

Thanks for tuning in being that mom isn't easy, but together we can be that mom strong. Don't forget to leave a review connect on social join. Dolly's free community till next time.

Speaker 1 (15:11):

Hey there, before you go, I want to just give you a heads up on something. When things have been hardest in my role as a mom, the thing that was so very helpful for me was having a routine to take care of myself each day. I know that this whole thing around raising kids in a digital world is so very overwhelming. But if you have a place where you are taking care of yourself every single day with a simple routine that works despite where you are or what your schedule is, you will be able to be more present for your family and handle all of the ups and downs of this most amazing role that we could ever play in this world. So connect with me and let's get you connected to fitness and nutrition tools made by experts that will help you simplify this and then connect you with my fit club community that will support you, guide you and give you momentum and motivation to show up every day. Take care of yourself first so that you could be better present for our digital native kids.

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