Are you a safe place to land? Reconnect with your kids today!

Episode 26

This episode highlights an ever-growing problem with the disconnect our kids feel in our digital world. We chat about trends and how to make sure your child is being seen and heard.

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For more info on this and the many other facets of raising a child in this digital age, please also check out childhood2movie.com and for Bark, use code BETHATMOM to subscribe to BARK today! If you are having suicidal thoughts, please reach out to friend or family or contact the Suicide hotline at 800-273-8255 or contact the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at suicidepreventionlifeline.org

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Help ensure the safety and normal childhood development of your child by grabbing the newest version of the GABB Wireless phone at THIS LINK or go to https://www.gabbwireless.com/promo/bethatmom and use code BETHATMOM for $10 off!! 

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Already have a smart phone or ready to give them one? Protect your child (and your sanity) in the digital world with BARK! Use code BETHATMOM for 20% off for life! https://www.bark.us

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Other options if you are considering a first phone (or need to backtrack on this decision):

• Relay go device can be found HERE
• Gizmo Watch can be found HERE

(A few of the above links are affiliate links that I may receive commission from at no extra cost to you! Your support is greatly appreciated!)

Want to be THAT Mom besties??? Jump in to my free Be THAT Mom Movement Facebook Community HERE! 

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Email me at [email protected] or connect with me on IG @dollydenson https://www.instragram.com/dollydenson 

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More info on the Be THAT Mom Movement https://www.dollydenson.com

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Be THAT Fit Mom!! Simplify your fitness/nutrition routine! Join me in the Align Your Life Fit Club! More info can be found at https://www.dollydenson.com/fitclub or at https://www.dollydenson.com/muscleburnsfat for the newest program I am doing. 

Listen to it now here or click HERE for your favorite podcast platform!

FULL TRANSCRIPTION:

Speaker 1: (00:00)
Hey there today. We are going to talk about reconnecting with our kiddos. It has never been more important than it is right now. So we have to talk about this. Stay tuned,

Speaker 2: (00:13)
Welcome to your source for tips, tools, and support to help you be that mom that is tuned in and proactive for yourself, your family, and for the wild ride of raising kids in this digital age, inspired by a mother's love with a relatable real life. Proud to be that mom flair. This is the bead that mom movement with your host Dolly Denson.

Speaker 1: (00:36)
So this episode is brought to you in light of suicide prevention month. I just recently watched a movie. If you have not seen it, you have to go check it out. It's called childhood 2.0, and you can find it at childhood two, like the number two movie.com. The information they shared in there is just quite eye opening. And, Oh my gosh, we all just need to know about this. And I so badly wish I could turn back time and be aware of these things when my kids were younger, because I had no idea. All of this was such an influence on my kid. What I'm talking about is just the digital age and all of the digital things and how they influence our children to not feel like they are enough and to constantly compare and to feel like they're left out of things. When they see kids or friends that are doing things online, you know, or posting about being at a certain party or something like that, and being excluded or purposely being excluded from being tagged on a post or not having enough likes on a post, not having enough followers, not having as many as that girl, not having clear skin like that girl that just posted, not having the hourglass figure, like some girl posted who is actually using some type of filter to pull in her waist or to make her skin look clearer.

Speaker 1: (01:54)
Our kids are facing all of these different things and how it is actually manifesting is in anxiety and depression, mental illness, suicide suicide is actually the second leading cause of death in children and young adults ages 10 to 24 and mental illness is actually the second leading health issue seen by physicians in children, teens, and young adults. Only second to obesity as the number one health issue being seen in children. This is it's like a, uh, like a, I don't know what you want to say. A perfect storm. That's been created by all of these things that we made and that we're not aware or influencing our kids like they are. They've even noticed that the suicide rate, I believe these are U S statistics, but the suicide rate from 2000 to 2007 actually was kind of stable and even started to have a downward trend.

Speaker 1: (02:46)
And then since 2007, they have seen a consistent uptick of this trend and actually seen quite a few spikes in the trend. And they correlate with the, of some things that are so very commonplace for us and our children. Now such as Facebook in 2007, Twitter in 2009, smartphones becoming more prevalent and more widespread in 2011 and 2012 Instagram in 2014 and chat in 2016. And this included kids that are like nine and 10 and 11 years old. And they're even seeing that like in the year, 2015, that 42% of suicide attempts or in children, age 11 and under, is that not crazy? Oh my gosh. So this is happening because of lounging smartphones. It's allowing social media tech companies creating these platforms and things that are addicting. They are attention seeking. You are inducing this fee feeling of wanting to belong and to want to get attention.

Speaker 1: (03:52)
It truly is the perfect storm when our kids are trying to be popular online in order to be popular in school. When our kids are being cyber bullied by someone, that's kind of like that mean girl or boy who is sitting behind a phone or a screen and creating a fake account. So they don't even know who it is. That's bullying them when they're being blocked or not tagged on posts intentionally to make them feel left out or to be inferior. And then the whole light distraction age of feeling like you always have to check again, you always have to see what those notifications yeah. And then not being able to handle boredom. So seriously, it is time that we put a focus on reconnecting with our kids. When kids have been surveyed in recent surveys that I've seen. The number one thing that they say is that social media should be limited and parents need to spend more time connecting and talking to their kids, but face to face time with your kid, the things that I'd recommend are things like having a family game night, having a day on the weekend where you all go hiking or camping or fishing plan a thing.

Speaker 1: (04:59)
Like we have something locally called I fly that it's like indoor skydiving. And we actually bought tickets for the whole family. And then right before the pandemic, we were going to schedule it and we still have not scheduled it here we are in September. We still have not scheduled it, but things like bowling, biking together, you know, just the things where you're like spending time with each other and you have to talk to each other. The other thing would be just, you know, dinner face to face dinner with each other, not sit in front of a TV, not having phones at the table, all of those things. So I hope that this was helpful in just helping you to be mindful that we need to reconnect with our children. Suicide is just such a prevalent thing. It's, um, you know, it's just spiking now in the midst of the pandemic.

Speaker 1: (05:42)
And just as a side note barks artificial intelligence system, where they detect issues and alert families for things like cyber bullying, drug use, suicide, depression, anxiety that they have more than 6 million messages from all of the apps that they monitor. And they found a number of alarming trends in children's online behavior. Since the pandemic began, they found a 23% increase in online predators. 63% rise in severe hate speech and 11% jump in messages with sexual content. So bark is definitely on top of monitoring all this stuff, and they have seen an increase in suicide, thoughts and comments and conversations. So reconnect with your family. And if you do host about it, if you are on Instagram or Facebook, tag me in your stories on Instagram specifically, you can tag me Dolly Denson, or be that mom movement podcast tag me in your stories. I want to see you reconnecting with your family.

Speaker 1: (06:44)
That makes me so, so happy. And as I end this podcast, I just want to give you a couple of thoughts to go away with bark posted about this mom. And this was actually in 2019 where Bart [inaudible] suicidal thoughts in her child. She received 150 alerts from bark that she would have not otherwise known about. She says she was actually quite clueless when it came to these things that her child was going through a quote from her when she was interviewed by the today show, she said, you don't let a kid ride a bike without a helmet. You don't allow them to drive in a car without a seatbelt. So don't give them a device that can access the world without a safeguard. Bark is one amazing way that you can give your child privacy while giving them access to the digital world, but also having a way to monitor and open lines of communication.

Speaker 1: (07:40)
If there is a concern that is detected. So please check out bark. If you haven't already, I know a ton of you have, and I thank you so so much for your support and you use my code. It gives you a discount. There's no extra cost to you to use my code. And it does support this podcast and helps me to create these episodes for you and bring more helpful information to you. So please, if you haven't already sign up for a seven day free [email protected], use code, be that mom. And if you have not yet, given your kiddo a phone or you want to backpedal and give them just access to a typical phone and be able to connect with them when they are away from you, please out gab wireless.com use code, be that mom for a discount. So as we close out this episode, yeah, I want to give you the suicide hotline. It is +1 800-273-8255 in the suicide prevention lifeline can be found at suicide prevention, lifeline.org. Please share those on your social media and with your family. Please have face to face conversations with your kids. Let them know that they are enough. Stay connected to them, make sure that they know that they can always come to you and that you are always a safe place for them to land. Thank you so much for tuning in.

Speaker 2: (08:58)
Thanks for tuning in being that mom isn't easy, but together we can be that mom strong. Don't forget to leave a review, connect on social and join. Dolly's free community till next time.

Speaker 1: (09:11)
Hey, if you are a mom that has a lot on your plate, like I do, and you struggle with anxiety or sleep or even chronic pain issues, please check out my soul cbd.com. They are the one and only CBD source that I trust. And you can use my code, be that mom for 15% off of your purchase.